D-Blog Week: What Brings Me Down & What Keeps Me Up

Today, the theme for Diabetes Blog Week posts is 'what brings me down'.  Talking about the moments, days and, for some, weeks when diabetes is making you want to scream, cry or hide away is really important.

During the majority of my teenage years, I went through a lot of times when I would completely ignore my diabetes and never talk about it.  There would be many meals eaten which I wouldn't give any insulin for and my body would be flooded with ketones.  There were whole days when I wouldn't test my blood sugars at all.  At one point, my HbA1c hit 12%.  I wasn't in contact with anyone else with type 1 diabetes, and I attempted to deal with that by pretending that I didn't have it either.

Things only began to change when I started blogging 3 years ago and I attended a DAFNE course.  I finally felt like I was surrounded by others who understood exactly what I was going through.  Most of the time nowadays, the reasons why I'm irritated by diabetes are because I'm putting all my effort into looking after myself, and sometimes what I see on my glucose meter doesn't reflect that.  For me, however, this is a better result than the exhaustion and illness I suffered when I paid no attention to my diabetes at all.  At least now, when I'm feeling down about it, it shows that I care about my health.

There are numerous aspects of diabetes that get to me, for example like when I'm covered in bruises from injections, or my blood sugars seem to make no sense at all.  There will probably always be times when diabetes will try to get the better of me but, when it does, I know where to come.  So thank you to the Diabetes Online Community - you have been crucial to my physical and mental health.  Because of you guys, I know that whatever aspect of diabetes is bringing me down, I'm not alone. 

:)

D-Blog Week: The Positive Diabetes Poem

The prompt for today's post is to write a poem about diabetes.  In 2012 I wrote a poem for the 'Health Activist Writer's Month Challenge' called Bad Diabetes Day, which I loved writing!  I'm always excited about opportunities to do something a bit creative and different, so I really enjoyed writing this one too:

The Positive Diabetes Poem

As a little girl I'd never tell,

That I had type 1 D.

I was worried what people might say,

And what they would think of me.

Did her parents feed her too much sugar?

Did she used to be fat?

I was embarrassed of my diabetes,

Didn't want to answer questions like that.

I just wanted to be normal,

Eat whatever I liked for tea,

Not have to think about my blood sugars,

Be injection and blood test free.

But as I got older I realised,

No one can be blamed.

I didn't 'make' myself diabetic,

I shouldn't feel ashamed.

Sometimes bad things happen,

But they make you who you are.

Focusing on the positives

Can get you really far!

Now when I inject in public,

Where other people might be sat,

I remind myself I have diabetes,

And there's nothing wrong with that!

D-Blog Week: Change The World

Diabetes Blog Week 2014 is here!  This is my fourth year of taking part and it's fair to say that if there's one thing that diabetes does make me excited about, it's this!  Thank you to Karen Graffeo at Bitter~Sweet for the opportunity to do this every year.  I'm currently in the latter stages of revising for my first year university exams, but the real test will be finding out how to tear myself away from reading all of the wonderful D-Related posts over the next 7 days.

The topic for the first post of D-Blog Week is to share something that we're passionate about.  I'm completely with my friend Vicki from Vicki's Notebook on this one.  I have a fire in my heart for a lot of causes and the right for all people with diabetes to have access to the insulin, test strips, needles and technology they need is one of the ones at the very top.  It sounds pretty awful now I think about it, but it wasn't something I remembering thinking about until last year when I received this tweet on Twitter:

I took a look at the website for Marjorie's Fund and my outlook on my own diabetes changed significantly.  Marjorie was born in Uganda and was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when she was 3 years old - the same age that I received my diagnosis.  She died when she was just 29 years old from kidney failure, caused by her diabetes.  She wasn't much older than I am now when she passed away, yet Marjorie was considered to be 'one of the lucky ones'.

Although diabetes can be awful for anyone who has to live with it, reading about the lack of resources and care available to those with type 1 in other parts of the world definitely made me feel very blessed.  I have entire drawers packed with needles, test strips, ketone sticks, spare injection pens and old glucose monitors and a whole compartment in the fridge full of insulin cartridges.  Other people with diabetes, like Marjorie, are battling to stay alive and living on as little as one insulin injection a day, if that.

However, the amount of medication a person has for any health condition should not be about luck.  A person with type 1 diabetes needs insulin, test strips, glucose monitors and diabetes education.  They have the right to those resources, irrespective of what part of the world they live in.  This is why organisations like Marjorie's Fund are so important - they help to give people the life they have a right to. 

R.I.P Marjorie

World Diabetes Day 2013: The Invisible Condition

Happy World Diabetes Day, everyone! :) In true WDD style, I awoke this morning with a blood sugar of 3.6 - a true reminder of the fact that I have diabetes and, along with the other 382 million people with the condition, this day is partly for me.

Diabetes is so often referred to as the 'invisible disease', the 'invisible disability', or the 'invisible condition' (I prefer the latter terminology!)  It's true, diabetes is invisible.  No one would ever know, when they see me on the street, that I've already checked my blood sugar and injected myself with insulin at least once that day.  However, sometimes, it feels to me that diabetes isn't invisible at all.

I see my skin when it's covered in sore patches of blue and purple - bruises from my injections.  I see the remainder of unhealed wounds everyday - permanent scars, because of the poor circulation my diabetes causes.  I see hundreds of pin-prick holes on the tips of my fingers - the proof of regular blood sugar monitoring.  I see a ghost in the mirror - pale and drawn from unstable blood sugars.

It's at times like these, when it feels like I have 'diabetic' tattooed on my forehead, that I have to remind myself that not everyone knows diabetes like I do.  In fact, some have never heard of it at all.  To them, my bruises and scars could be from sporting injuries, my face pale as a result of late nights and, as for the pin-prick holes, they would probably never be noticed at all.

I realise that because diabetes is invisible, it's so important that we let people know what it is.  For me, World Diabetes Day is always about raising awareness.  It's about making people aware of the symptoms of undiagnosed diabetes and the symptoms of hypo/hyperglycemic episodes.  It's about letting people know the differences between the types, how it is treated and how it affects those dealing with it on a daily basis. 

If we can all go out today and learn something, or tell someone one thing about diabetes, we are contributing towards a future where an invisible condition becomes one which is understood.  If we can fall asleep tonight, or any night for that matter, with one more person in the world knowing something about diabetes that they didn't before, we should be proud! :)  So today I go out in the world, wearing blue and taking the invisibility cloak off the shoulders of diabetes - hopefully I'll learn something too!

D-Blog Week: Diamonds of The DOC

There are several reasons why I love D-Blog Week but the main one is that it invites people living completely different lives, in completely different parts of the world, and brings them together through writing about one thing we all have in common - diabetes.  Seeing as this is the final post of this years D-Blog Week, it's time to shed some light on some of the superstars of the Diabetic Online Community.  Thank you to the following people in particular, some being new discoveries and some old favourites, for providing me with lots of quality reading this week:

The Tangerine Diabetic

Dave's posts are fantastically written and his ability to make the D seem humorous is so uplifting.  I'm so glad that he decided to take part in D-Blog Week as reading the musings of The Tangerine Diabetic the past few days has been a treat!

1 type 1

Kim's blog is one of my exciting new discoveries, thanks to D-Blog Week!  I love how her posts are so heartfelt that they manage to have me on the verge of tears one minute and then sporting a smile from ear-to-ear the next.  I hope my attitude towards my diabetes is as great as hers after 26 years of living with it.  Really looking forward to reading more from 1 type 1 after this week!

Vicki's Notebook

Vicki's writing is truthful, inspirational and absolutely beautiful.  Through D-Blog Week her posts have been first point of call for me to read before writing my own, as her ability to make you see the positive side of diabetes is a daily necessity.  Vicki's Notebook is consistently wonderful and enjoyable to read and Vicki's spirit is consistently contagious!

Teapot Diabetic

Emma's blog was one of the first that I started reading when I started writing about my diabetes 2 years ago and I've been addicted to her posts ever since.  Her down to earth approach to diabetes is admirable and the Teapot Diabetic is a very honest account of living with type 1.  Keep writing, Emma - I love it!

Thank you Karen Graffeo at Bittersweet Diabetes for organising yet another amazing opportunity to get further involved with and meet other wonderful members of The DOC.  It's because of the people in The Diabetic Online Community that diabetes feels less like a burden and more like a blessing.  Also a massive thank you to those who have read my posts this week and beforehand - as always, your acknowledgement and support means so much!

I have a 2 hour train journey today, so I plan to spend it all catching up on the posts from the last week and I can't wait!  It is with sadness that I say goodbye to D-Blog Week 2013, but I am looking forward to seeing you all again next year.  Wishing everyone in the DOC happiness, health and heroic blood sugars! xo

D-Blog Week: Diabetes Art Day

I always really enjoy diabetes art prompts, but I've got to admit that I was feeling a little bit felt-tipped out after yesterday's post!  However I remembered a style of D-Art I've seen circulating the DOC since I started blogging and always wanted to have a go at, so here she is...the Type 1 Diabetes Supplies Girl!

D-Blog Week: D-Thanks Fairy Does Diabetes!

I've opted for the wild card prompt of 'design your dream diabetes device' today, simply for an opportunity to bring back an old favourite of mine.  The first year I participated in D-Blog Week, and actually exactly 2 years ago today, I chose to use a wild card and wrote a story called 'Weeping Daisy and The D-Thanks Fairy'.  Since then, good old D-Thanks Fairy has made a couple of other appearances on Diabetic Dais and so I thought it would be a shame for her not to show her face again this year.

She used to be a whisper of encouragement in times of need but, as of now, D-Thanks Fairy is so much more!  When you are low, she sprinkles her magic dust on you and your blood sugars rise to them to a perfect level without a peak.  When you are high or you've just eaten a meal, she injects your insulin for you with super-soft needles so they never leave a mark (she may be only small, but she's wondrously strong!)  She never forgets to pick up your prescriptions for you and when you are about to run out of insulin in your cartridge, she senses it on the tips of her wings and flies to the fridge to bring you a new one.  She's an expert carbohydrate counter and she knows everything there is to know about diabetes, so you never need to see a clinician again if you don't want to - just ask her!

She lives inside your glucometer and some people think she answers to the name of 'NOT AGAIN!', but she doesn't really.  More often than not, she appears when she hears you say this because she knows it's when you need her most.  Her real name is D-Thanks Fairy and she's called this because she makes you thankful for the important things, like life itself.